Tuesday, January 10, 2017

24. Antiphon to Ennui or A Shameless Way to Avoid Boredom



            “And if you’ll step this way, you’ll become acquainted with the family mummy, a cherished family member.”
            The group filed dutifully into a dimly lit chamber transformed by trompe l’oeil into an Egyptian tomb. They clustered around their guide.
            “This ancient gentleman is believed by the Van Pelt family to be a distant relative, based on the location of the catacombs in Alexandria, Egypt, where he was laid to rest.”
            “Do they know his name?” inquired a man to Melchiora’s right.
            “Knatphornatten,” she replied.
            Melchiora paused, then continued, refreshed.
            “This room depicts the second level of the catacombs. The spiral staircase in the far corner was the means by which bodies were brought down to the center of the tomb, then placed in a designated burial niche. Note the sculptures, eerily alive in appearance. Pillars are topped with lotus, acanthus leaves, papyrus, and two falcons below a winged sun. Also note the Egyptian hair decoration and the Roman style of clothing.”
            “Beautiful,”’ breathed an observer.
            “The Van Pelt’s, like many Gold Coast Families, went to great expense and excess to provide a proper setting for their mummy. Other families did not consider their acquired mummy to be family, as the Van Pelts did. They hosted lavish dinner parties with famous, often royal guests, with unwrapping of the mummy as after dinner entertainment.” To the varied murmurs she replied, “So it goes.” 
            Melchiora approached the body in the center of the room encased in glass. The visitors drew around her and gazed silently at the dark gray head and hands of the deceased, exposed above the wrappings.
            “Mummies of this time period, approximately 2 AD, were embalmed and wrapped with hands forced forward on the front of the body. They were left uncovered. The facial cloth has been removed. The reason for this pose is an obeisance to Bastet, and to fend off any who would violate his remains.”
            “I’ve studied Egyptian artifacts as an apprentice at The Natural History Museum in LA before going into historic furniture. I never heard anything like this,” stated a young woman with a serious expression.
            Melchiora shifted her eyes to her questioner’s face before turning her head to address her.
            “The dynasties of the early Christian calendar have many historic intricacies that often vary from what is more commonly known. I have my information from a visiting scholar of obscure antiquities from Vienna. He gave a lecture here when he came to see the estate and I have complete faith in him.”
            The young woman nodded her head slightly in acceptance of the hallowed word of a professor. Satisfied that her guests were once again with her, Melchiora went on.
            “Macabre as this setting may be, a certain family practice is even more so. On specific occasions of the year, Knatphornatten had a companion in his bed chamber of sorts. One of the family would have a small divan brought in and sleep beside him.”
            Melchiora drew her eyes from the mummy’s form to the faces of her listeners. Riveted.
            “Why would they do that?” gasped a woman with a tight grip on the shoulders of her son in front of her. “That’s gruesome!”
            Melchiora noted that the son exhibited a wide, pleased smile.
            “I couldn’t begin to tell you.”
            The group followed Melchiora into the intricately carved, black-walnut hallway. A question floated from behind her.
            “And how did they make their money?”
            In the cavernous sitting room flanked by hearths guarded by iron lions poised on hind legs, Melchiora turned and replied, “Shipping. The Van Pelt Shipping Enterprises was a stable conglomerate for many, many decades. Of course their wealth was also due to contraband imported into the country under the innocent guise of shipments to private companies. They didn’t exist. Stolen artifacts were sold to unscrupulous collectors.”
            “They really were robber barons,” exclaimed a man as he gazed up at the embossed ceiling.
            Melchiora stifled the impulse to laugh.
            “How long have you worked at this museum?” he queried.
            “Oh, it’s been seven years now. Before this, I was up state in Elk Hollow at a small museum dedicated to the history of the Green Mountain Boys.”
            At his blank stare she said, “You know, the Battle of Mauritania. I’m sure you’ve heard of it.”
            “Yes, yes, I’m sure I have.”
            Melchiora led them through the lavish bedrooms on the second floor. In each she provided an interesting personal tidbit concerning a former inhabitant.
            “Trisha Van Pelt had a heated house built for her cats. Her father was allergic… Mrs. Olivia Van Pelt had special corsets designed to hide an odd deformity in her back… Harold Van Pelt suffered from an unusual rash that he contracted from going abroad. It could only be treated with leeches… Lorelei Van Pelt spoke eleven languages… Corporal John Van Pelt collected rare beetles…Mr. Rory Van Pelt rolled cigars from leaves from his prized rhododendrons.
            As they returned to the grand foyer, Melchiora put on her high-wattage smile and thanked them for coming. She gave a slight bow to their applause.
            “Thank you for your interest in the story of the Van Pelts!”
           

(866 words)







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